How To Develop Effective Communication Skills For Couples

By Kelly Wood


Most relationships reach a point when people have trouble communicating with each other. However these problems can be overcome and most tensions can be resolved by avoiding more destructive approaches and developing a healthier approach to discussion. Developing effective communication skills for couples can make all the difference and it is worth knowing how to learn them.

As with any skill it is wrong to assume that anyone can instantly learn them. Some people may very good at listening but may find it harder to verbalize their own opinions. Equally some people may be very vocal and self confident but may lack empathy and be less able to realize when their behavior is destructive.

A lot of the time this can be traced back to family interaction. Some families are very lively and debate is encouraged. Other families may be a bit quieter and may not be as verbal when it comes to communicating with each other. Neither of these approaches is necessarily right or wrong.

Conversely there are people that may not necessarily want to talk. This can create the misunderstanding that they are cold. However it can equally be that they are shy and may take a bit longer to open up then someone who is naturally confident. In most cases nobody quite fits these two extremes. The way to deal with this is to explain your situation. This does not mean you attempt to pin the blame on somebody else. It is about explaining how you feel and how your partner can help improve the situation. Equally it is about recognizing your own flaws and working on addressing them.

This is why you need to openly discuss any issues you may have. However there is a difference between open discussion and being overly honest. You should not resort to name calling or actively looking to seek blame for problems. This type of arguing will not lead to resolutions.

Another thing to remember is that stress and emotional situations are best avoided when you want to have a discussion. If you feel a conversation become heated walk away and get some distance between you and your partner. This break can then make it easier to think a bit more rationally and discuss the situation.

It is also important to remember that people are not born with perfect communication skills. Even people who think they are good listeners can become disillusioned if they are constantly expected to listen to problems without being able to unload themselves. The problem is that the people doing the unloading may not always realize this.

As with any skill learning effective communication skills for couples is something that can be done with professional help. There are numerous courses and teachers available to guide you through this process with sensitive and practical advice. Use your regular search engine to find out what is available in your local area.




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