My mind is dripping with paint. Colors casted all over the never-ending canvas of my mind. Mixing. Swirling. Blasted with colour. How rare for a mind that was stripped of colour not so long ago...one that was encumbered by the darkest shades of of blacks and the space between those dark shades and white. There existed only that. Nothing apart from that. There are stunning and complicated portraits of memories that unfold like streamers in my mind. I used to curse these never-ending reels of tape falling from the ceilings. They would play again and again in my mind again. Moments. Memories. Feelings. Laughter. My mind felt weighed under by their presence. I tried to manage the uncontrollable nature of them, to only find that once a flutter of wind came by they'd unscramble time upon time.
This was the story about a man great suffering. Regret. Pain. Fear.
A damaging force inside himself controlled by the bittersweet manufacturing of life's greatest challenges and tests. A type of man who feared the real, the true, and to stand up for what deeply beckoned inside his heart and drove his ambitions. A type of man destroyed by a force burning him to death from a fierce cold that froze even glimmers of any warmth inside his heart. I was the sort of man who gripped on too tight to what existed, strangling whatever was to the point of breathlessness. My grip was grim, turning things to dust, allowing them to sift through my fingers. My hands callused from building walls and fending off barbarians of love.
I was the sort of man whose heavy hands were beaten to a pulp by his efforts to grasp onto things that needed to change, to find that that there honestly a disability to manipulate what must shift. The agony that was made from watching the inevitable changing of things only brought more fear, more darkness, more discomfort.
I was that sort of man, once upon a time.
One day I chose to let go. Of everything. All that I feared, all that I adored. Everything in that moment, became much lighter. I started to deeply believe that all would arrive in time, that love would run its course, lessons would show up at my front step and I could really begin to live.
I let the streamers, oh those beautiful tapestries of my mind unfold as they wished, bobbing around the expansive room of my thoughts with true freedom and grace. I took the time to walk with their wonderful colours appreciating their subtleties and depth. In turn, I granted myself the opportunity for utilizing what was divine within my soul. I commenced to talk to the heavens and for once, rather than living in continued suffering, I just lived, giving up existing for something far grander.
But amongst it all, I became the kind of man that could be dripping with full colours and could watch everything go. I could hold other people with open palms so they were free to fly. I could grin at things that once caused me discomfort. My hands, in spite of their strength, became very gentle. I became softer. My words became deeper. My feelings became stronger. And with all that, the strength of the looks I gave others became engulfed with zeal. I stopped looking at others and looked far into them.
I was once the sort of man who suffered continually.
Now, I have become the kind of man who suffers, and with that, loves deeply.
I am moving on with a full heart.
This was the story about a man great suffering. Regret. Pain. Fear.
A damaging force inside himself controlled by the bittersweet manufacturing of life's greatest challenges and tests. A type of man who feared the real, the true, and to stand up for what deeply beckoned inside his heart and drove his ambitions. A type of man destroyed by a force burning him to death from a fierce cold that froze even glimmers of any warmth inside his heart. I was the sort of man who gripped on too tight to what existed, strangling whatever was to the point of breathlessness. My grip was grim, turning things to dust, allowing them to sift through my fingers. My hands callused from building walls and fending off barbarians of love.
I was the sort of man whose heavy hands were beaten to a pulp by his efforts to grasp onto things that needed to change, to find that that there honestly a disability to manipulate what must shift. The agony that was made from watching the inevitable changing of things only brought more fear, more darkness, more discomfort.
I was that sort of man, once upon a time.
One day I chose to let go. Of everything. All that I feared, all that I adored. Everything in that moment, became much lighter. I started to deeply believe that all would arrive in time, that love would run its course, lessons would show up at my front step and I could really begin to live.
I let the streamers, oh those beautiful tapestries of my mind unfold as they wished, bobbing around the expansive room of my thoughts with true freedom and grace. I took the time to walk with their wonderful colours appreciating their subtleties and depth. In turn, I granted myself the opportunity for utilizing what was divine within my soul. I commenced to talk to the heavens and for once, rather than living in continued suffering, I just lived, giving up existing for something far grander.
But amongst it all, I became the kind of man that could be dripping with full colours and could watch everything go. I could hold other people with open palms so they were free to fly. I could grin at things that once caused me discomfort. My hands, in spite of their strength, became very gentle. I became softer. My words became deeper. My feelings became stronger. And with all that, the strength of the looks I gave others became engulfed with zeal. I stopped looking at others and looked far into them.
I was once the sort of man who suffered continually.
Now, I have become the kind of man who suffers, and with that, loves deeply.
I am moving on with a full heart.
About the Author:
Evan Sanders is the author of The Words Of Encouragement, a website dedicated to bringing the best quotes, motivational content on the web, and blogs all to one place. Need some more content to help you move forward with your life having your heart broken or being dumped? Try out these letting go quotes for some help. Trust me, they are good.