The emotional pain and torment of a breakup can be difficult on even the toughest guys. You would probably prefer physical pain over what you may be going through. At least you would have some sort of idea of how quickly you would heal and a doctor could tell you what to do to speed the process. The torment comes from knowing exactly what will end your pain. If your girlfriend or wife would simply give you a second chance then the path to healing would be simple. You would have something to do. You would have a goal and you would come up with a plan to bring the two of you back together again.
There really is no difference between a breakup with a woman that was your wife and a woman that was your girlfriend. Many people say that having your wife leave you is more painful but this would be like comparing losing an arm to losing a leg. Both of them hurt and in both cases it is necessary to deal with the pain and restore the lost limb or, in this case, the lost partner. The sooner you are able to deal with the loss and restore the connection, the better. This logical sort of thinking is what will help you to get your ex back as quickly as possible. We are going to talk about the same methods that the military uses to help soldiers deal with stress after battle. You will see that these proven techniques will help you to heal and move forward with your life and prepare you for the process of getting back together with your girlfriend or wife in the shortest time possible.
Initially, you might want to grieve or mourn the death of your relationship. This is understandable and encouraged. Set aside some time to be upset, angry, hurt and emotional about your breakup. Don't let yourself dwell too long upon these emotions and set a time limit on this grieving process. Once you have grieved for a day or so, you are going to debrief. You are going to give yourself a factual account of what happened in your relationship. You will remember what went well and what went wrong. You will recount what you did wrong as well as what your ex did wrong. You will remember moments when you felt that you had seen progress in the right direction and you're going to do all of this without emotion or judgement. Throughout this process, you are going to put everything in the past and put it to rest.
Putting events of the past where they belong is important. Often we try to fix things by reliving the past. We mourn the loss and beat our self up wishing that we had done things differently. We can't go back. We can only go forward. There should be a certain freedom that you will feel once you decompress and debrief from what happened. There's nothing you can do about the past other than to make sure that you don't make the same mistakes again.
The next step involves get some rest and relaxation. Just like combat veterans who have seen battle, you need a little bit of time to blow off some steam and live life a little. You have seen your share of hell, you have put it behind you and now it's time to remember what life is all about. You have survived and you will get that second chance with the woman you love. Be happy about that and celebrate. Today is the first day of your new life and it's up to you to decide what direction you will head in. Begin by doing things that bring you joy or make you feel good about your life.
While many soldier go a little crazy and begin drinking like fish, you might want to avoid alcohol for the moment. It might be tempting to party hardy but this kind of activity can sometimes cause even the strongest man to fall back into old patterns of behavior. A moment of weakness might cause you to call your ex and proclaim your undying love for her or even want to see her again so you can tell her how much better you're feeling. Avoid this temptation at all cost. This is not the time to see your girlfriend and you should be strong and of sober mind when that moment does come. You need to have your life together completely before initiating contact with your ex. Get out of town or visit friends for a weekend. Go to the shore or to another city to allow yourself to unwind and decompress. This might help you to avoid the desire to see your ex also.
When you return home, it's time to start getting back into shape mentally, emotionally and physically. It's time to start taking care of yourself and training for your big comeback. It's time to education yourself about relationships and how women behave in relationships. Look at this as your training to get back in there and win your ex girlfriend or wife back. Learn about her, what makes her tick and why she reacts the way that she does when she's in a relationship. Women behave much differently than men. They are emotional. Men are logical. Train that logical part of your brain to target her emotions and you will be well on your way to winning her back.
You might still be filled with fear or doubt right now but if you think this plan through you will understand that it will work. Removing the emotions as well as the blame for what happened and getting to work on yourself is the fastest way to get your girlfriend or wife back. Focus on what you can do instead of what you did in the past. It is a waste of your time and energy. The sooner you regain your confidence and self-esteem, the sooner you will be able to win her back. If you prolong this process and allow yourself to feel horrible for another month or so, you will be kicking yourself for wasting time. You have some work to do but the reward will be getting your ex back in the shortest time possible.
There really is no difference between a breakup with a woman that was your wife and a woman that was your girlfriend. Many people say that having your wife leave you is more painful but this would be like comparing losing an arm to losing a leg. Both of them hurt and in both cases it is necessary to deal with the pain and restore the lost limb or, in this case, the lost partner. The sooner you are able to deal with the loss and restore the connection, the better. This logical sort of thinking is what will help you to get your ex back as quickly as possible. We are going to talk about the same methods that the military uses to help soldiers deal with stress after battle. You will see that these proven techniques will help you to heal and move forward with your life and prepare you for the process of getting back together with your girlfriend or wife in the shortest time possible.
Initially, you might want to grieve or mourn the death of your relationship. This is understandable and encouraged. Set aside some time to be upset, angry, hurt and emotional about your breakup. Don't let yourself dwell too long upon these emotions and set a time limit on this grieving process. Once you have grieved for a day or so, you are going to debrief. You are going to give yourself a factual account of what happened in your relationship. You will remember what went well and what went wrong. You will recount what you did wrong as well as what your ex did wrong. You will remember moments when you felt that you had seen progress in the right direction and you're going to do all of this without emotion or judgement. Throughout this process, you are going to put everything in the past and put it to rest.
Putting events of the past where they belong is important. Often we try to fix things by reliving the past. We mourn the loss and beat our self up wishing that we had done things differently. We can't go back. We can only go forward. There should be a certain freedom that you will feel once you decompress and debrief from what happened. There's nothing you can do about the past other than to make sure that you don't make the same mistakes again.
The next step involves get some rest and relaxation. Just like combat veterans who have seen battle, you need a little bit of time to blow off some steam and live life a little. You have seen your share of hell, you have put it behind you and now it's time to remember what life is all about. You have survived and you will get that second chance with the woman you love. Be happy about that and celebrate. Today is the first day of your new life and it's up to you to decide what direction you will head in. Begin by doing things that bring you joy or make you feel good about your life.
While many soldier go a little crazy and begin drinking like fish, you might want to avoid alcohol for the moment. It might be tempting to party hardy but this kind of activity can sometimes cause even the strongest man to fall back into old patterns of behavior. A moment of weakness might cause you to call your ex and proclaim your undying love for her or even want to see her again so you can tell her how much better you're feeling. Avoid this temptation at all cost. This is not the time to see your girlfriend and you should be strong and of sober mind when that moment does come. You need to have your life together completely before initiating contact with your ex. Get out of town or visit friends for a weekend. Go to the shore or to another city to allow yourself to unwind and decompress. This might help you to avoid the desire to see your ex also.
When you return home, it's time to start getting back into shape mentally, emotionally and physically. It's time to start taking care of yourself and training for your big comeback. It's time to education yourself about relationships and how women behave in relationships. Look at this as your training to get back in there and win your ex girlfriend or wife back. Learn about her, what makes her tick and why she reacts the way that she does when she's in a relationship. Women behave much differently than men. They are emotional. Men are logical. Train that logical part of your brain to target her emotions and you will be well on your way to winning her back.
You might still be filled with fear or doubt right now but if you think this plan through you will understand that it will work. Removing the emotions as well as the blame for what happened and getting to work on yourself is the fastest way to get your girlfriend or wife back. Focus on what you can do instead of what you did in the past. It is a waste of your time and energy. The sooner you regain your confidence and self-esteem, the sooner you will be able to win her back. If you prolong this process and allow yourself to feel horrible for another month or so, you will be kicking yourself for wasting time. You have some work to do but the reward will be getting your ex back in the shortest time possible.
About the Author:
Visit http://matt-huston-ex2-system.positive-and-optimistic.org/ to discover how to get your girlfriend back in the shortest time possible. See how others have found success and how you can too.