It's quite normal for you to have an intense desire to get back together with your wife or ex-girlfriend after she broke up with you. She was your best friend and the person that you cared about the most in this world. The rejection from having someone that close to you can be overwhelming and difficult to deal with emotionally. It has taken a toll on your male ego, your self-confidence and you are left with a giant hole in your life. Wanting to get her back in your life again as soon as possible is probably on your mind throughout most of your day. You should realize though that your attitude and how you deal with your ex is more important than any plan that you might hatch to get her back.
Trying everything under the sun to make your ex change her mind and come back to you is typical. You try talking, being nice, being mean, buying gifts, writing poetry, sending cards and anything else that you can think of after a breakup to get the woman you love to come back to you. What you probably didn't realize is that none of this stuff works unless she has a desire to be with you. Begging, pleading and talking only make you look weak and needy. If you are kicking yourself now, don't worry. Give her some time and change your attitude and you can still get her back. Of course, it's going to require that you refrain from continuing with this behavior. This means no more calling her, apologizing to her or going out of your way to talk to her until the time is right. You will know that the time is right to call her and try to open the lines of communication when you don't think about her or feel that overwhelming desire to hear her voice. Of course, it's always better if she contacts you first.
Your primary focus now is to change how your ex-girlfriend or potential future ex-wife thinks about you. This is going to require you to change your general attitude towards her and women overall. What will this attitude be like? Your attitude should be one where you are unwilling to tolerate being talked down to or treated in any way that makes you feel uncomfortable. If your ex does make you feel uncomfortable or upset, you need to be willing ahead of time to walk away both from the relationship as well as the conversation. Always keep this in mind and remind yourself of this new attitude and it will be felt by your ex-girlfriend if not seen by her the next time she starts treating you poorly.
Try not to worry about how your girlfriend or wife is going to react. You might fear that by doing this she will think that you're done with the relationship or that you're just bluffing but you will be surprised. What you are actually doing is taking the power away from her in the relationship. What you're going to do from now on when she treats you poorly is to tell her quietly and in a matter of fact tone that she is not your girlfriend or your wife and that you don't have to listen to her garbage. You will turn away from her and literally walk away. This is what a man who has some self-confidence would do and it works. She will either come after you to apologize immediately or she will apologize at some point when she realizes that you're serious. Resist the temptation to listen to her if she comes after you and continues to yell at your or laugh at you. Once you have removed yourself from the situation on your own terms you will have passed her test and she will have gained some much needed respect for you as a man.
If you have been upset since your breakup there might be a chance that your ex has seen you cry. She might know that you're depressed about the breakup. In the future, you're not going to let your ex know anything about your life other than the fact that you are happy, loving life and ready to move on without her, if necessary. Without a word, you are rebuilding your life. You are happy and you have things that you want to do with your life as well as the strength to achieve these goals. Instead of holding onto that depressed personality and being sad about your breakup, you are happy with life and you're living life to the best of your ability.
You might worry that your ex-girlfriend or wife will take your new found confidence as a slap in the face. You might think that she will think that you don't care about her anymore or that you don't want her back. That's fine. Let her think that. Let her ask you about it. Life is for living and we all only have a certain number of days on this earth to live. If she wants to be a part of that life then that would be great but if not, you still have to be happy. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to have everything that you ever desired in life. You're a new man. Never let her see you sweat and never let her see you cry.
This is your time to really plan out your life and begin to dream. You can still secretly include her in your dreams or even make plans based upon what the two of you used to dream but, for now, this is your life we're talking about. Write down some of the goals that you have for yourself. If you could live life on your terms, what would it look like. Don't hold anything back. Shoot for the stars. Write down exactly what you would do, who you would be doing it with and include every feeling, emotion and nuance that you can think of. Take this breakup as being a wake-up call. Losing your girlfriend or wife can give you the motivation to create a life that anyone in their right mind would be happy to be a part of and it's your life.
With a strong, positive attitude you can change your life and change how your ex thinks and feels about you. Your fears are unfounded and you will find later on down the road that all the things that you are worrying about are wrong. You might think that your ex will be upset if you don't appear to miss her when in actuality she will feel sad herself. You worry about moving on with your life because you fear that your ex will think that this means that you don't love her. The truth is that she will feel left out and begin to feel attracted to you because of your new attitude. Take the bull by the horns and stand up for yourself. Be strong and you will find that your ex and every other woman on the face of the planet will find you more attractive. Soon your ex will be knocking on your door or calling you on the phone to find out how you are and what you've been up to. This is the first sign that she wants to get back together. Will you be prepared to talk to her when that moment comes?
Trying everything under the sun to make your ex change her mind and come back to you is typical. You try talking, being nice, being mean, buying gifts, writing poetry, sending cards and anything else that you can think of after a breakup to get the woman you love to come back to you. What you probably didn't realize is that none of this stuff works unless she has a desire to be with you. Begging, pleading and talking only make you look weak and needy. If you are kicking yourself now, don't worry. Give her some time and change your attitude and you can still get her back. Of course, it's going to require that you refrain from continuing with this behavior. This means no more calling her, apologizing to her or going out of your way to talk to her until the time is right. You will know that the time is right to call her and try to open the lines of communication when you don't think about her or feel that overwhelming desire to hear her voice. Of course, it's always better if she contacts you first.
Your primary focus now is to change how your ex-girlfriend or potential future ex-wife thinks about you. This is going to require you to change your general attitude towards her and women overall. What will this attitude be like? Your attitude should be one where you are unwilling to tolerate being talked down to or treated in any way that makes you feel uncomfortable. If your ex does make you feel uncomfortable or upset, you need to be willing ahead of time to walk away both from the relationship as well as the conversation. Always keep this in mind and remind yourself of this new attitude and it will be felt by your ex-girlfriend if not seen by her the next time she starts treating you poorly.
Try not to worry about how your girlfriend or wife is going to react. You might fear that by doing this she will think that you're done with the relationship or that you're just bluffing but you will be surprised. What you are actually doing is taking the power away from her in the relationship. What you're going to do from now on when she treats you poorly is to tell her quietly and in a matter of fact tone that she is not your girlfriend or your wife and that you don't have to listen to her garbage. You will turn away from her and literally walk away. This is what a man who has some self-confidence would do and it works. She will either come after you to apologize immediately or she will apologize at some point when she realizes that you're serious. Resist the temptation to listen to her if she comes after you and continues to yell at your or laugh at you. Once you have removed yourself from the situation on your own terms you will have passed her test and she will have gained some much needed respect for you as a man.
If you have been upset since your breakup there might be a chance that your ex has seen you cry. She might know that you're depressed about the breakup. In the future, you're not going to let your ex know anything about your life other than the fact that you are happy, loving life and ready to move on without her, if necessary. Without a word, you are rebuilding your life. You are happy and you have things that you want to do with your life as well as the strength to achieve these goals. Instead of holding onto that depressed personality and being sad about your breakup, you are happy with life and you're living life to the best of your ability.
You might worry that your ex-girlfriend or wife will take your new found confidence as a slap in the face. You might think that she will think that you don't care about her anymore or that you don't want her back. That's fine. Let her think that. Let her ask you about it. Life is for living and we all only have a certain number of days on this earth to live. If she wants to be a part of that life then that would be great but if not, you still have to be happy. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to have everything that you ever desired in life. You're a new man. Never let her see you sweat and never let her see you cry.
This is your time to really plan out your life and begin to dream. You can still secretly include her in your dreams or even make plans based upon what the two of you used to dream but, for now, this is your life we're talking about. Write down some of the goals that you have for yourself. If you could live life on your terms, what would it look like. Don't hold anything back. Shoot for the stars. Write down exactly what you would do, who you would be doing it with and include every feeling, emotion and nuance that you can think of. Take this breakup as being a wake-up call. Losing your girlfriend or wife can give you the motivation to create a life that anyone in their right mind would be happy to be a part of and it's your life.
With a strong, positive attitude you can change your life and change how your ex thinks and feels about you. Your fears are unfounded and you will find later on down the road that all the things that you are worrying about are wrong. You might think that your ex will be upset if you don't appear to miss her when in actuality she will feel sad herself. You worry about moving on with your life because you fear that your ex will think that this means that you don't love her. The truth is that she will feel left out and begin to feel attracted to you because of your new attitude. Take the bull by the horns and stand up for yourself. Be strong and you will find that your ex and every other woman on the face of the planet will find you more attractive. Soon your ex will be knocking on your door or calling you on the phone to find out how you are and what you've been up to. This is the first sign that she wants to get back together. Will you be prepared to talk to her when that moment comes?
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